Why I Don't Care About the Royal Rugrat

Not sports related, but I have to say this. I don't understand America's fascination with the royal family, William and Kate, and their new son.

There are a lot of things happening in the United States that are more important than a future king being born that won't be crowned king until I'm about 80 years old. Apparently, CNN didn't have any other stories to fill their coverage over the past 48 hours.

The Royal baby watch in this country was a joke. It was already enough people were waking up at 4am to watch William and Kate's wedding in 2011. The only thing British that Americans should get a pass for waking up at that time to watch is the Open Championship.

Now, we found ourselves waiting for the birth of a baby that had no impact on my life, or yours. I can picture most of the Americans devoted to this coverage are women who always wanted to live the life of a princess like Kate Middleton is doing right now. Ladies, I love you, but the only way you'll get close to royalty in America is a Kennedy. Us other guys, we're good enough, right?

I guess you can say I'm more shocked at how some cable news outlets covered it, like it was a world changing event. The last time that a baby was born that impacted the world was born in a manger outside an Inn. I expect the entertainment channels like E! to cover the story to the point where you will throw your flat screen TV out the window. CNN, which I thought was a "news" channel, has a royal correspondent? What kind of job is that?

"Let's talk to our royal corespondent, Susie Smiles. Susie, what happened inside the palace today?"

"Well, the queen had tea at 3pm, when she normally has tea at 3:30pm. We don't know what this means for the United Kingdom and the Windsor family, but we'll keep you updated."

We don't care about William changing the diaper. Really? A prince changed a diaper? Isn't there someone in that palace who could do that? Of course not. It's like the tabloid pictures where everyone gets to see how celebrities (and Royals) are "just like us."

The United Kingdom is America's strongest ally. So I guess we feel like we have to give a damn when something that happens all over the world every day, every minute, happens to someone who is royal.

The U.K. has our back, and we have theirs. I get it. It would be hard to sell that idea to the founding fathers, but times have changed since the early 19th century.

The founders broke away from the British Empire, so that we didn't have the oppression of a king or queen, taxation without representation and having to wait on a Prince and Duchess to have a baby that will be king long after most of us who are 30 or older are dead.

The royal baby watch is just another example of the media procrastinating and avoiding news and current events that are far more important. Hold on, I just heard the baby just spit up. I hope CNN's royal correspondent is there with the details.